“Ladies : Why to expect Happiness from others, when we can’t make ourselves Happy?”

Hello Friends,

Generally, I found that People blame others for their Unhappiness,
But we ourselves didn’t make an effort to make ourselves Happy.

Let me tell you one story :

One of my friend starts her day by preparing Breakfast/ Tiffin for her Kids,as per their choice.
Lunch as per Husband’s choice.Because she wants them to be “Happy”.Then she quickly makes her kids
ready for school and drop them. After dropping them, she rushed for office.She works very hard in office, to make her seniors “Happy”. She bought fruits, chocolates or some eatables for her family everyday when she come back home.She got very tired after reaching home, but her kids want her to play with them.In spite of her tiredness, she played with them because she doesn’t want them to be “Unhappy”.
Then she wraps up kitchen tasks and help her kids in completing their Homework.
After doing all this, she sleep, to start another day.

She is very enthusiastic, fun-loving person. She often plans, get together with her family, friends
and colleagues. She is very good at cooking, so she prepares a variety of mouth-watering dishes for her guests.Because she wants her guests to be “Happy”.

She planned her Kids Birthdays, Husband’s Birthday, Marriage Anniversary in advance.
Because by giving surprise to her family, she wants to see “Happiness” on their faces.

One day she was very sad, I asked her : “What happened dear”?
Firstly she said nothing yaar, just stressed. But after asking so many times she said :
“Yaar, I did so much for my Family’s (Husband + Kids) Happiness, but they didn’t feel
that they should respect me for that or else they should also think something for me”.

After listening to her, I asked few questions to her :

1. Are you unhappy, after treated like this?
She said : Yes.

2. Who is your best friend?
She answered : I think, no one. But for namesake, I have so many friends.
I replied : “You”, try to be your Best Friend. No one else can understand more than you.

3. When you feel some pain, you don’t feel well, who else can feel the same with you?
She answered : No one can understand my pain, its mine only.

4. What you do to make yourself Happy?
She answered : After making others happy, I also feel Happy.

5. Then why are you “Unhappy”, because rest all are happy?
She answered : I don’t know.

Then I tried to give her an answer to her “I don’t Know” :

I told her you will definitely feel happy, after making others happy.
But, you should make yourself “Happy” first. You should start Appreciating yourself
for the work you are doing for your family or for your Workplace.

Can’t you prepare one day meal of your choice to make yourself happy, rather than expecting
that someone should bring something of your choice, or rather than blaming others for not doing anything for you?
Can’t you give treat to yourself after getting Hike/Promotion in your office, or after achieving some
accolade rather than expecting it from your family or blaming them for not doing anything for you?
Can’t you buy gifts for yourself for your Birthday, Anniversary rather than expecting it from others?
Can’t you plan travel for yourself, to feel yourself relaxed?
Can’t you give time for yourself, for your hobbies, instead of asking someone to do anything for your entertainment?

Moral of the Story :
We should give “Priority” to our happiness first, then only we should think of
other’s happiness, because if you think about others first, ultimately it will take you
to the “Way to Unhappiness” . And if you blame others for not doing anything for yourself,
after doing so much for them, They may say, we didn’t ask you for that, we thought you are
doing that, because it makes “You feel Happy”.

“So try to give Importance, Priority to “You” first, Because if you don’t value yourself no one else
can do also”.

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“Fatherhood” : A Biggest Challenge for every Men!

This article is dedicated to all Fathers.

When I was a kid and started speaking, I used to say Mum-ma, Pa-pa, Ba-ba and so on
I have learned, to whom I should say Mumma, Papa and so on.
But now I understand the meaning of Father.

Father is :

1. A “Teacher” : Who teaches me and helped me in started walking on my 2 legs,
He teaches me how to ride a Bicycle by holding my bicycle from back and running behind me,
He teaches me how to make sacrifice, compromise, adjustment in life to make our Family Happy.

2. A “Doctor” : After telling or discussing my problems, worries, pains with him, all my
Problems, Pain, Worries vanishes, as they were never there.

3. A “Painter” : Who painted “Canvas of my Life” with lots of colors of Happiness.

4. A “Pilot” : Who always helped me in taking-off “My Plane of Dreams”.

5. A “Soldier” : Who protects his family from every bad situation, every crisis, every Threat.
We feel always safe, when he is with us.

6. A “Chef” : Who cook “Stories”, instantly when we didn’t feel to sleep.

7. An “Engineer” : Who always fix issues with my Toys, Watch, Appliances etc.

8. An “ATM” : In this ATM, we didn’t deposit anything but still we can get lots of love,
Happiness and Care, anytime we wish to.

9. A “Magician” : who can make anything possible.

10. Most Importantly, A “Bestest Friend” in My life.

Message for all Kids :

“We enjoyed our life a lot because of our “Father”, But being a Father is a very big Challenge, for any Men.He took that challenge and make himself so strong : “Emotionally”, “Physically”, “Financially”,so that he can play all roles (whatever I have discussed above), to give us a Better and Happy Life.”

A Big Salute to all “Fathers”.

Wishing all Fathers a very Happy Father’s Day!

-Swapnil

Biggest lesson of Life from 2’s Table : “Two One Za Two” !!!!

Hello Friends,

In our childhood, we all have learned Tables and most of us like Table of 5, 10, 20 because we found them very easy to remember.

That time learning tables from 2 to 20, was such a difficult Task.
Even more difficult from learning cooking, ridding bicycle etc..
and when Teachers asked randomly anything from tables, we almost got confused.

But whatever we do first time, generally that memory is
unforgettable. I remember when I have learned 2’s table.

I say it like:

“Two 1 Za Two”
“Two 2 Za Four”
“Two 3 Za Six”
“Two 4 Za Eight”
“Two 5 Za Ten”
and so on………….

I have never think what is “Two 1 Za Two” ??

One day I realized that : Why we say “Two 1 Za Two”?
Then I have asked my Husband about this.
He told me that it’s not “Two 1 Za Two” : It is “Two 1’s are Two” and so on

🙂

Then I realized that from last around 20 years,
I was making a mistake and nobody even makes me correct,
Infact today also, many of us used to say tables like that only,
without thinking “What does “Two 1 Za Two” really Mean”??

Moral of the Story :

Sometimes it happened that someone told us or teach us to do something and
we keep on doing that, without thinking :

Why we are doing that?
What will happen, if we will do that?
Whatever we have learned is correct or not?
What is the meaning behind what we are Saying, Learning, Doing?

So better ask questions from ourselves first and if you don’t get
any answer try to ask from others and find answers for your Questions.

Conclusion :

If you will blindly follow, “what others are doing, what others are saying,
How others are living, what makes others to get happy, What makes others to get
excited, what makes other to feel confident” : You will end up by making mistakes.

Better analyze and experience “What”, “Why” , “For whom” : You’re doing anything.

-Swapnil

Our Society : “Son” and “Daughter” Both are Equal!!! – Really ???

Dear Friends,

Now-a-Days I can see many campaigns to save “Girl” child,
But my Question for everyone is : Are we really saving “Girl Child”?
Do we really think that “Son and Daughter Both are Equal” ?

I think : “No”.

Let me try to convince you all :

1. Parents in front of Society “Proudly” say – “My Daughter is like my SON“.

But why feel “Ashamed” by saying – “My Son is like my Daughter” ?

2. If a girl wear Trouser, Jeans, Tops, Shirts and is having a TomBoy look.
They feel “Proud” that my “Daughter” dressed like a “Boy”.

But why feel “Ashamed”, if their Son wear Salwar Suits, Sarees etc….?

3. They feel “Proud”, if their “Girl”- Drive a Car/ Bike/ Airplane etc…

But why feel “Ashamed”, if his “Son” – cook for his family (Parents/Wife/Kids etc..) or do Household Chores?

4. They feel “Proud” if their “Girl”, play sports like Boxing, Football etc..(Basically strength based sports)
But why feel “Ashamed” if his Son learn Classical dance like Kathak/Bharatnatayam etc..?

5. They feel proud after Daughter’s Marriage that she is Independent, Working, Handling her family
But feel “Awkward/Hesitated”,if she give them something, or taking care of them(even after her marriage).

But why they expect from their “Son”, that he should take care of them even after his marriage also?

Conclusion :

In our Society we just “Teach”, “Preach”, Equality among Genders.
We never practice it.

God has created two different Species “Males” and “Females”
Every Specie has its own Beauty, Weaknesses and Strengths.
We cannot expect same out of each.

So why promote equality when God himself, didn’t create them Equal.
Both “Male” and “Female” have different “Physiology”, “Psychology” , “Strengths” and “Weaknesses”

So why our society wants a Girl to behave as a “Girl” as well as a “Boy”, and not Vice-Versa ?

-Swapnil

“Now you’re Changed” : Biggest Problem after some years of Marriage

My dear friends, “Change” is the only Constant, which will
definitely happen. Don’t overlook the fact that,
You also “Changed”, “Changing” and will definitely “Change” (both Physically and Emotionally).

So why to expect from your Husband that he will remain the same all through your life?

In fact, if he is not changing then something wrong is happening.
Don’t try to be a girl friend after Marriage,you do so
because you want to see a Boyfriend in your Husband.
But Unfortunately,you will not get your Boyfriend back, Now he changed to “Husband”.

Relations and Humans are not like Water which will change into
Liquid, solid, vapors and retain its all original form again if we give them
respective environments.

Consider below things and decide whether, Is it “OK” to blame
your Husband after marriage that : “Now you’re changed” ?

1. Every year our age count change, can we stop that?
2. Everyone enjoyed their school life, can we continue going to school all though our life?
3. After School, now its college, “Best Phase of Life” , can we continue going to college, all though our life?
4. After college, Some are working, Will our First Job, First Assignment,
First Manager, First Team Lead, will remain the same all through our life?
5. Most Important for Married Women, the most important part our life,
“Our Maid”, will it remain the same all through our life?

Conclusion : Humans are meant to change and so relations,
“Important thing is change should be positive”,
I know not all changes we can accept, but that change
which are bothering u will itself change after sometime.

So have Patience and give time to yourself (For accepting Changes),
Don’t get hyper, Don’t get worried if something is changing.

No one can stop it, what we can do is, we can also change as per the “Change”.

-Swapnil