“Ladies : Why to expect Happiness from others, when we can’t make ourselves Happy?”

Hello Friends,

Generally, I found that People blame others for their Unhappiness,
But we ourselves didn’t make an effort to make ourselves Happy.

Let me tell you one story :

One of my friend starts her day by preparing Breakfast/ Tiffin for her Kids,as per their choice.
Lunch as per Husband’s choice.Because she wants them to be “Happy”.Then she quickly makes her kids
ready for school and drop them. After dropping them, she rushed for office.She works very hard in office, to make her seniors “Happy”. She bought fruits, chocolates or some eatables for her family everyday when she come back home.She got very tired after reaching home, but her kids want her to play with them.In spite of her tiredness, she played with them because she doesn’t want them to be “Unhappy”.
Then she wraps up kitchen tasks and help her kids in completing their Homework.
After doing all this, she sleep, to start another day.

She is very enthusiastic, fun-loving person. She often plans, get together with her family, friends
and colleagues. She is very good at cooking, so she prepares a variety of mouth-watering dishes for her guests.Because she wants her guests to be “Happy”.

She planned her Kids Birthdays, Husband’s Birthday, Marriage Anniversary in advance.
Because by giving surprise to her family, she wants to see “Happiness” on their faces.

One day she was very sad, I asked her : “What happened dear”?
Firstly she said nothing yaar, just stressed. But after asking so many times she said :
“Yaar, I did so much for my Family’s (Husband + Kids) Happiness, but they didn’t feel
that they should respect me for that or else they should also think something for me”.

After listening to her, I asked few questions to her :

1. Are you unhappy, after treated like this?
She said : Yes.

2. Who is your best friend?
She answered : I think, no one. But for namesake, I have so many friends.
I replied : “You”, try to be your Best Friend. No one else can understand more than you.

3. When you feel some pain, you don’t feel well, who else can feel the same with you?
She answered : No one can understand my pain, its mine only.

4. What you do to make yourself Happy?
She answered : After making others happy, I also feel Happy.

5. Then why are you “Unhappy”, because rest all are happy?
She answered : I don’t know.

Then I tried to give her an answer to her “I don’t Know” :

I told her you will definitely feel happy, after making others happy.
But, you should make yourself “Happy” first. You should start Appreciating yourself
for the work you are doing for your family or for your Workplace.

Can’t you prepare one day meal of your choice to make yourself happy, rather than expecting
that someone should bring something of your choice, or rather than blaming others for not doing anything for you?
Can’t you give treat to yourself after getting Hike/Promotion in your office, or after achieving some
accolade rather than expecting it from your family or blaming them for not doing anything for you?
Can’t you buy gifts for yourself for your Birthday, Anniversary rather than expecting it from others?
Can’t you plan travel for yourself, to feel yourself relaxed?
Can’t you give time for yourself, for your hobbies, instead of asking someone to do anything for your entertainment?

Moral of the Story :
We should give “Priority” to our happiness first, then only we should think of
other’s happiness, because if you think about others first, ultimately it will take you
to the “Way to Unhappiness” . And if you blame others for not doing anything for yourself,
after doing so much for them, They may say, we didn’t ask you for that, we thought you are
doing that, because it makes “You feel Happy”.

“So try to give Importance, Priority to “You” first, Because if you don’t value yourself no one else
can do also”.

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